Welcome friends and family!
It has been a bumpy ride, but God has given me strength, love, friendship, and, FINALLY, health. My prayers have been answered, my miracle was granted, and I want to share the joy of my new life with you.
My entries begin in April of 2008 and my double lung transplant was December 10. Scroll down to my blog archive and you can read from the beginning or jump around. If you are looking for a specific topic, you can use the search engine.
I hope I can help you to experience the love God has for each and every one of us!
May God Bless You with Miracles in Your Life! Nancy
Wednesday, April 29, 2009
Tuesday, April 28, 2009
Hannah bought a Slip & Slide over the weekend and she and her cousins have been really enjoying playing in the water. Thought you might enjoy seeing some of the action. We had temperatures in the 80's yesterday. It is supposed to cool down for the rest of the week.
Happy 38th Birthday to my Scotty today. Hannah and I are going to make a big deal about it tonight for sure!
I am doing a little better. The medication seems to be helping the depression and I am not sleeping as much, which is a relief. I am still struggling with a great deal of anxiety, but that should eventually pass, it is probably mostly from my elevated blood count numbers.
I am still waiting for my Bronch. to be re-scheduled. My white blood count was up high enough to do it, so I am just waiting for an appointment.
I hope you are having a wonderful beginning of the week! All my love, Nancy
Monday, April 27, 2009
Saturday, April 25, 2009
All my love! Nancy
Friday, April 24, 2009
I have recently acknowledged that I am severely depressed right now and have reached out for the appropriate help. By reaching out I have discovered that this is a common experience for people who have had a transplant. I was sick for so long with one thing keeping me going, the thought of a transplant. When the transplant occurred, I experienced a temporary high, but then I got dropped back into reality and instead of landing on solid ground, I dove down deep under water and I'm struggling to swim out.
My whole life has changed and I don't know how to handle it, what I'm meant to do now, or how I begin to move forward again. This is very scary producing a great deal of depression and anxiety.
These last few weeks I have tried to keep a positive spin on the blog, showing you the fun things we have been doing, but that has been a way to mask the hurt and sadness I have been feeling. I have felt extremely guilty about this, believing I should be happy and thrilled with my new life, but between the physical and emotional issues I am dealing with, that just isn't possible and it isn't my fault either.
All I can do is ask for your prayers and to please not be disappointed with me. Thank you! Nancy
Monday, April 20, 2009
Saturday, April 18, 2009
I was finally able to get in touch with my transplant coordinator yesterday. Unfortunately, my white blood cell count is still too low to even consider a Bronch. So, I am back on shots of Nuepogen to try to get my bone marrow to start doing its job. I will give myself three shots then go in for blood-work on Wednesday. At the rate we're going, it will be a couple of weeks before I have my Bronch. re-scheduled.
My other blood results are improving, yet still need some work, so we made some medication changes to try to get them back on target.
It is beautiful here today. Scott and several of his friends have been riding motorcycles on his track and I have enjoyed just sitting and watching them. I hope you are enjoying your Saturday as well! Love to you all! Nancy
Friday, April 17, 2009
If you get a chance, treat yourself to ice cream tonight, you deserve it! Love, Nancy
Thursday, April 16, 2009
Wednesday, April 15, 2009
Tuesday, April 14, 2009
Today I have had a little more energy which is greatly appreciated. It seems like I have been in a funk for weeks now, so unmotivated and tired. It has been very discouraging and disheartening. I have been reflecting on what I thought post-transplant would be and it is so much different. I guess, like many of you, I thought once I recovered from surgery I would become healthy and "normal" again. Though I am breathing (hooray!) I am still struggling and that adds to the overall discouragement. Please don't think I am not grateful for all I have and the miracle I have received, I am just not being patient enough with my expectations of how I should be feeling.
I had told you I was working on my third book, but the last month or so, I just haven't had the umph to work on it. I think it is important for me to write, however, because no one warned me about what things would be like after the transplant. The fear, the anxiety, the tiredness, but also the mixture of extreme joy and thankfulness. I hope my new book can help other transplant patients to better prepare for life after transplant, but also to help people who have not had a transplant appreciate the lives they have been given.
Please pray for a renewal of my inspiration to write and also for energy, I desperately need some.
Thank you all for continuing on this journey with me. I can't wait for the day when all I have to report is wonderful news! All my love, Nancy
Monday, April 13, 2009
Jasper put on his Easter best.
Sunday, April 12, 2009
Saturday, April 11, 2009
I wanted to share something kind of neat that is happening with my finger nails. People with CF have clubbing and discoloration of the nails due to the lack of oxygen. As my nails are growing out post-transplant, they are a nice light pink color and are no longer clubbed. There is an obvious line where the new growth meets my old nails. They are going to be so pretty when they finally grow out, it is very exciting!
Friday, April 10, 2009
We are home earlier than expected today. My Bronch. had to be post-poned because my white blood cell count is extremely low and doing the procedure would have put me at risk for developing pneumonia. The doctor prescribed Nupogen which is an injection I give myself for 3 days that should help to regenerate the white cells. We'll see what the numbers look like on my Monday labs and then they will re-schedule me for a day next week, ugh, back to Pittsburgh.
Many of my levels are still off whack and I continue to be pretty anemic which is why I have felt so droopy and tired lately. I am on iron and an injected medication for that as well.
All of my other appointments went well. My ENT said my nose looked beautiful, my Endocrinologist complimented my quick learning of controlling my sugars with my pump, and I had gained 5 lbs which made my Gastroenterologist proud.
Now I am ready to gear up for Easter, I can't believe it is coming on Sunday!
May today be a day of quiet and reflection in preparation for the rising of our Lord. Nancy
Tuesday, April 7, 2009
We head to Pittsburgh tomorrow for several appointment and won't be home until Friday, so don't be concerned if you don't hear from me until over the weekend.
Enjoy this week of preparation for Easter. All my love! Nancy
Monday, April 6, 2009
We then decided to give Hannah an early Easter present, so we headed to Claire's to get her ears pierced. She was super nervous and excited all rolled into one. She did a great job and has repeatedly told us that it didn't hurt. She can't seem to stop touching her ears and admiring herself in mirrors.
Friday, April 3, 2009
I took a second trip to the Chiropractor this morning and should be good for awhile. The pain seems to have resolved and I am just sore now. I also got in the mail a medication that I have to give myself as a shot once a week that should help with my anemia. I am hopeful that if we can get the anemia under control I might get some umph back. It is tough to drag through the day.
Spring break has started. Some of you e-mailed me some great ideas to do with Hannah, thanks for your help!
I hope your having a great Friday and have some fun weekend plans to look forward to! My love to you all! Nancy
Thursday, April 2, 2009
I keep hoping I'm going to wake up one morning and just feel great, hop out of bead ready and raring to start the day. So far, no such luck, but I am not giving up on that dream.
I had a visitor today, my friend Ruth, which always brings me joy. My mother-in-law cleaned the bathrooms, so that made my day as well, nothing like a clean bathroom!
That is all to report. Hannah and I are on our own for dinner, so I have to come up with something good for us to eat, oh the pressure!
Hope you had a great day! Nancy
Wednesday, April 1, 2009
I continue to feel better each day. I took a trip to see my Chiropractor today and am hoping he can work some of the kinks out of my back to give me more relief. I was always fearful of Chiropractors, but it is amazing how much they can help when you are in pain and the doctors are only providing heat and pain meds as a solution.
Hannah is counting down the days to Spring Break. They have off for two weeks starting Friday at 12:00. How I am going to keep her busy is beyond me, any helpful ideas would be appreciated. We return to UPMC next Wednesday for a brutal three days of appointments, so I am trying to get some good rest to build up for that adventure.
Please don't forget to send in your checks for Great Strides ASAP if you would like to participate. A special thank you to those of you who have sent in donations.
I hope your week is going great and please don't be afraid to introduce yourself if you see me out, it is so nice to put faces with all of the love and prayers I have been receiving! All my love! Nancy